My Path to Purpose and an Unexpected Impact

I wanted to be Mary Tyler Moore’s “Mary Richards” TV character from the 1970s. She had exactly what I wanted: independence and an exciting life! But growing up as the first girl in a traditional Italian family, I knew she was not the right role model.

Nonetheless, I ignored the expected path (much to my parents’ dismay) and spent twelve years in corporate America becoming Mary. That is, until two questions rocked my world. I dramatically left my job, career, and Mary for a more purposeful path that was mine, and I never looked back.

As a nine-year-old girl in front of the TV memorizing my idol’s every move, I could never have imagined this would be my story.

As a successful television marketing executive in New York City, I had everything Mary had: a thrilling job in a big city, a pretty apartment, a fabulous wardrobe, a fun best friend, and co-workers like family. But one afternoon, while sitting alone in my pretty apartment in the big city of New York, my life changed forever when I heard an inner voice quietly yet clearly ask me:

“If this is the next thirty years of your life, is this enough?”

I was thirty-eight years old, and I knew all the voices in my head, but this one felt like it came from a deeper place and was located a little lower. In a millisecond, I knew the answer: No, something was missing. And I also knew what that something was—children.

My mind went right to a recent TV news report where police and social workers were storming an apartment to remove children who were being hurt. I called the police and asked where they brought these children. They told me about the emergency shelters in our city for children who were abandoned and abused.

Within minutes, I began calling these shelters, instinctively asking if I could visit in the evenings with storybooks to read to the children before bedtime. For several weeks, I showed up at the shelters, sitting on the floor in my business suit, with the children forming a crescent circle around me. I felt more personally grounded and connected to these children with every visit.

The group of children was never the same, but in their silence, they all looked to me for comfort and safety. I never wanted to leave. One night after story time, I followed the staff to the bedroom.

The children slowly climbed onto couches and futons. Some were crying as the compassionate caregivers tried to comfort them. But I didn’t see what I remembered as a child in my own bed. There were no hugs from moms or dads, no snacks, whispers, or prayers. There was no changing of their clothes from the tight or soiled clothing they arrived in.

As I watched the children try to comfort themselves and each other, the words that tumbled out of my mouth were, “Can I bring the children pajamas next time?”

The next week, after I read their stories, I gave each child a brand new pair of pajamas. One little girl, about six years old, refused to take a pair of pink PJs from me. Her hair hung in lopsided pigtails, she wore a stained top and a pair of too-short lavender pants, and extra-large sneakers flopped as she walked.

She watched me for a long time, and when I finished with the others, I tried again to give her the cozy pink pair. She again shook her head. I knelt and whispered, “See how soft these pajamas are? Go ahead and feel them. You can keep them always.” And as she gingerly brushed her hand gently across a sleeve, she asked me wearily,

“What are pajamas?”

My mind raced. What?? I looked up at the loving aid next to her, who mouthed to me, “She doesn’t know what pajamas are.” And I found myself explaining to this precious girl what pajamas are. She took them slowly and went into the bedroom with the aid. As I collected myself and reached the door, I turned back and saw her waiting for me to see her in her new pajamas, a small smile forming on her lips.

I took a leap of courage, and the Pajama Program was born. My purpose found me.

Learning how to recognize and harness your heart voice is the key. Although it only takes a minute to hear it, it takes a while to trust and follow it.

So, how do you trust that voice? I was stunned and had to collect myself before I even thought about what I had heard. I was alone, but I looked around cautiously to see if someone else was there. There was no one. But I already knew who asked that question—it was me, just in an unfamiliar voice.

Learning how to recognize and harness your heart voice is the key. Although it only takes a minute to hear it, it takes a while to trust it and follow where it takes you. What happens next can catapult you into the unknown. But if you follow it, you will feel more fulfillment and joy than you ever have.

Going from corporate executive to nonprofit founder was daunting, but after much fear and doubt, thousands of sleepless nights, and tears that could fill the Atlantic, I overcame challenges that I thought would ruin everything. Sometimes you just have to do it afraid.

I met each turn with faith, determination, and moxie. I had found my purpose, and a chain of events set in motion by a little girl is creating a legacy we can only attribute to the magic of the human connection.

“It’s not the power of one that changes things; it’s the power of ONE ANOTHER that moves mountains and moves people.”

How do you go from “hearing a voice” to not only changing your life but also the lives of others? Each of us has a purpose. We know we have found it when our interests are turned outward and our natural desire becomes to lift others up by creating something that makes a lasting impact on all of us.