7 situations in life where the best thing to do is be brutally honest, according to psychology


There’s a thin line between sparing someone’s feelings and being brutally honest.

Trust me, I’ve been there. We’ve all faced situations where honesty seems like the hardest option. But sometimes, it’s the best one, according to psychology.

There’s a thin line between sparing someone’s feelings and being brutally honest.

Trust me, I’ve been there. We’ve all faced situations where honesty seems like the hardest option. But sometimes, it’s the best one, according to psychology.

Psychology tells us that brutal honesty can serve as a wake-up call, a reality check that pushes people to confront issues head-on.

In this article, I’ll share with you 7 situations in life where psychologists agree – the best course of action is to be brutally honest. Let’s dive in.

1) When someone is in denial

We’ve all known people who are in denial about something. It could be a problem at work, a health issue, or a relationship that’s going south.

Psychologists argue that denial is a defense mechanism that helps us cope with the tough reality. But it can also be a roadblock to solving the actual problem.

Living in denial is like living under a cloud of illusion. It obstructs clear thinking and makes it impossible to face the truth.

In such situations, being brutally honest can serve as an essential reality check. It can penetrate the cloud of denial and bring the person face-to-face with the truth they are trying to avoid.

Brutal honesty, in this case, could be the push they need to start tackling their problem head-on.

2) When you’re asked for your honest opinion

I remember a time when my best friend was about to make a career move that I knew was a terrible idea.

She was excited, but I saw the red flags she was overlooking.

She asked for my opinion, and I hesitated. Do I just go along with her excitement or do I tell her what I really thought?

Psychologists affirm that in such situations, being brutally honest is the best option. Why? Because people generally ask for your opinion because they trust your judgment.

I took a deep breath and told her my concerns. It wasn’t easy, but I knew it was the right thing to do.

My friend took it well. She reconsidered her move, did some more research, and ultimately decided against it.

It wasn’t the answer she wanted initially, but she thanked me for being honest and preventing a potential disaster.

3) When it concerns public safety

Did you know that the ‘bystander effect’ is a psychological phenomenon where people are less likely to help a victim if others are present?

It’s believed that this occurs because individuals assume that someone else will step up.

Now imagine you witness a dangerous situation—a car with faulty brakes, a reckless driver, an unattended fire. You might think someone else will report it, but what if everyone thinks the same?

In these situations, brutal honesty is not just the best thing to do—it’s a moral responsibility. Reporting the danger can prevent accidents and save lives.

In the face of public safety, there’s no room for silence or assumption. Your honest action can make a significant difference.

4) When you’re unhappy in a relationship

Relationships can be tricky. They’re a delicate balance of give and take, understanding and communication.

But what happens when you’re unhappy and unsure if the other person feels the same way?

Psychologists suggest that in such scenarios, brutal honesty is the best course of action.

Silence or evasion can lead to resentment and further deepen the chasm of unhappiness. On the other hand, expressing your feelings honestly can provide a much-needed release.

It’s not about blaming or criticizing, but about expressing your feelings and concerns.

This honesty could either lead to a constructive conversation about improving the relationship or provide the clarity needed to move on.

It’s better to voice your discontent than to let it simmer inside you. Honesty, albeit brutal, can pave the way for happier and healthier relationships.

5) When you’ve made a mistake

A few years back, I found myself in a tricky situation at work. I’d made a significant error on a project, and I was terrified of the consequences. For a moment, I even considered covering it up.

But what does psychology tell us about such situations? It’s in these moments that brutal honesty is most crucial.

Covering up a mistake only adds to the stress and can potentially lead to more significant issues down the line.

So, with a heavy heart, I confessed my error to my boss. Yes, there were repercussions, and yes, it was uncomfortable. But it also lifted the weight of guilt off my shoulders.

Being honest about my mistake allowed me to learn from it. My boss appreciated my transparency, and we worked together on fixing the issue. In the end, it built more trust between us than if I had tried to hide it.

Admitting our mistakes isn’t easy, but it’s an essential step towards learning and growth.

6) When health is at stake

Health is one area where there’s absolutely no room for sugar-coating. Whether it’s about lifestyle choices leading to potential diseases, or a serious illness that someone is unaware of, brutal honesty is key.

Psychologists assert that in such scenarios, the kindest and most responsible thing to do is to share the truth, no matter how harsh it may be.

Imagine you know a friend who smokes excessively, or a loved one who neglects their diet despite being diabetic.

By not addressing these issues directly, you’re indirectly enabling their harmful behaviors.

Yes, the conversation might be uncomfortable, and they might even react defensively initially. But by being brutally honest, you could prompt them to take necessary actions that could potentially save their life.

7) When someone’s actions are hurting others

If you witness someone’s actions causing harm to others—be it emotionally, physically, or psychologically—the situation calls for brutal honesty.

Psychologists agree that staying silent in such scenarios makes us complicit in the harm caused.

When we choose to be brutally honest, we not only stand up for those being hurt but also give the person a chance to correct their behavior.

It’s not about accusing or attacking—it’s about highlighting the impact of their actions. Your honesty could be the wake-up call they need to change their harmful ways.

Final thoughts: Honesty is liberating

The complexities of human interactions and the need for harmony often make us hesitate to embrace brutal honesty.

Yet, psychologists affirm that honesty, even when it’s brutal, has a profound impact on our mental health and relationships.

One such impact is the sense of liberation that comes with honesty. Holding back the truth can be emotionally draining.

It creates a burden of unexpressed emotions and unresolved issues. By being brutally honest, we free ourselves from this burden.

In all the situations we’ve discussed, brutal honesty isn’t about causing pain or discomfort. It’s about creating space for truth, growth, and resolution.

Whether it’s helping someone face reality, expressing dissatisfaction in a relationship, or admitting our own mistakes – brutal honesty paves the way for constructive change.



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