If your partner avoids these 7 phrases, they might be emotionally closed off

Ever heard the saying, “Communication is key”? Well, it definitely rings true in any relationship.

But what if your partner is not so forthcoming? How do you navigate those waters?

Here’s the deal.

It’s not always what your partner says that matters. Sometimes, it’s what they don’t say that can give you clues about their emotional availability.

In this case, a silent partner can be more revealing than a chatty one.

And I’m not just talking about the quiet types who prefer actions over words.

I’m referring to those who actively avoid certain phrases that would normally foster intimacy and connection.

And if you’re thinking, “My partner does that”, well, they might just be emotionally closed off.

If they are, caution: they may have an emotional barrier up.

Understanding is the first step towards a solution. Let’s get started on this journey of emotional exploration together.

1) “I love you”

Now, this might seem like an obvious one, right? But it’s worth mentioning because of its significance.

Here’s the thing.

“I love you” is not just a simple phrase. It’s an emotional connection. It’s vulnerability.

It’s an admission of deep feelings.

If your partner is consistently avoiding this phrase despite being together for a while, it might be a sign of emotional unavailability.

Of course, there are other ways to express love. Actions can speak louder than words, after all.

But in a romantic relationship, it’s important to hear those three little words every now and then.

If they’re missing, it might be time for a heart-to-heart conversation about your emotional needs and expectations.

2) “I’m sorry”

This one hits close to home for me.

Apologizing is an art. It requires humility, self-awareness and a willingness to take responsibility for your actions.

I remember a time in my own relationship when I was waiting…and waiting…for an apology that never came.

It was after a petty argument, the kind we’ve all had at some point.

The issue was trivial, but the hurt feelings were real.

But here’s the kicker.

My partner refused to say “I’m sorry”. It wasn’t about who was right or wrong anymore. It was about their inability to acknowledge and validate my feelings.

In retrospect, I realize that their avoidance of this phrase was indicative of their emotional closure.

They were unwilling to be vulnerable enough to admit a mistake.

If your partner consistently avoids saying “I’m sorry”, it might suggest an emotional disconnect, a lack of empathy or even an inflated ego – all red flags for emotional unavailability.

3) “I need you”

Someone once told me that a relationship isn’t about needing someone, it’s about wanting them.

I agree, but only to an extent.

It’s true that we shouldn’t be entirely dependent on our partners for our happiness, but it’s also healthy to acknowledge that we need each other in certain ways.

Let me paint you a picture.

“I need you” can be an admission of reliance.

It’s a way of saying, “I trust you to support me when I’m not at my best”. It’s a way of showing vulnerability and inviting your partner to do the same.

But here’s where it gets tricky.

If your partner avoids saying “I need you”, they might be trying to maintain an illusion of self-sufficiency.

They might fear that showing any form of dependence would make them look weak.

And honestly? That’s a load of baloney.

It takes strength to admit that you need someone. It takes courage to show your vulnerabilities.

If your partner can’t bring themselves to utter these three words, it could be because they’re emotionally closed off.

4) “I was wrong”

Nobody likes to admit they were wrong. It’s a blow to our ego and a hard pill to swallow. But it’s also a mark of maturity and emotional intelligence.

Here’s why.

Admitting you were wrong shows that you value the relationship more than your ego.

It shows that you’re willing to learn and grow from your mistakes.

But what if your partner never says “I was wrong”?

Well, that could be a red flag.

If your partner is always playing the blame game or deflecting responsibility, it might be their way of avoiding vulnerability.

It could be a sign that they’re emotionally closed off.

We all make mistakes. It’s part of being human. What matters is how we handle those mistakes and learn from them.

5) “I’m scared”

Consider this.

Expressing fear in front of others can increase our emotional connection with them.

It’s because fear is a primal emotion. It’s raw and honest.

But expressing fear requires vulnerability. It requires trust. And for someone who’s emotionally closed off, admitting they’re scared can be… well, scary.

“I’m scared” isn’t just about being afraid of spiders or thunderstorms.

It can be about expressing fears related to the relationship, like the fear of getting hurt, the fear of not being enough, or even the fear of love itself.

If your partner never shares their fears with you, it might be because they’re protecting themselves from potential emotional pain.

And that, my friend, is a classic sign of emotional unavailability.

6) “I appreciate you”

There’s a profound beauty in feeling seen and appreciated, isn’t there?

The phrase “I appreciate you” goes beyond simple gratitude. It’s a recognition of your partner’s efforts, qualities, and your shared experiences.

But, for someone who is emotionally guarded, expressing appreciation can feel like giving too much away. It may feel like an invitation for potential hurt or rejection.

If your partner seldom or never says “I appreciate you”, it doesn’t necessarily mean they don’t value you. They may show it in other ways, through actions rather than words.

However, verbal reassurances are important too.

They strengthen emotional bonds and affirm your importance in their life.

It’s okay to express your need to hear these words. It’s about feeling valued and loved. And that’s not too much to ask for, is it?

7) “Let’s talk about our feelings”

This, right here, is the cornerstone of emotional intimacy – open and honest discussions about feelings.

It’s through these conversations that we deepen our understanding of each other.

It’s how we navigate through conflicts, misunderstandings, and even personal growth.

If your partner avoids this phrase like the plague, it could indicate a fear of emotional depth, a reluctance to be vulnerable or an inability to effectively communicate their emotions.

And that’s a big deal.

Because without emotional communication, it’s hard to build a strong, resilient and balanced relationship.

It’s like trying to sail without a compass – you might stay afloat, but you’ll likely lose your way.

Final thoughts

Recognizing emotional unavailability in a partner can be challenging.

And if you’ve identified with the signs we’ve discussed, it’s essential to remember this – it’s not your fault.

Emotional openness is deeply personal, rooted within an individual’s past experiences, fears and insecurities.

But here’s the silver lining – awareness is your first step towards change.

Consider having an open, honest conversation about your feelings with your partner.

It’s not about blaming or criticizing. It’s about expressing your needs and understanding theirs.

Change may not happen instantly. It requires patience, understanding, and often, professional guidance.

But every step towards emotional openness is a step towards a more fulfilling relationship.

Take a moment to reflect. What does emotional availability mean to you?

How does it affect your relationship? And most importantly, what steps can you take towards fostering emotional intimacy?

And as you ponder these questions, always remember – you deserve a relationship that offers emotional depth, connection, and authenticity.